Tag Archives: parents

Parental guilt

We all feel guilty for some of our decisions we make regarding our children! Is there any benefit for the child or the parent?
I’m pretty sure you’re still with me here.
Over the last couple of weeks, I have been thinking about some of the things that we do for/to our kids so that we can feel less guilty for having to make those hard decisions for our children.
Recently I met a women that has similar food restrictions in her family, as we do in our home. She was telling us how, many years ago she was feeling sorry(guilty) that her child had so many restrictions on thier diet. She let them have a sandwich(the child is celiac and SCD as well) and this created many months of undesirable consequences for the child and more guilt for he parent!
I have felt the same way many times, just wondering if it is all worth it. When your friends and family scauf at you because you say stuff like “our child can’t have sugar”. They say stuff like “what candy can they have?” like you didn’t spend years with your child in pain and years of frustration trying to figure a way for them NOT to hurt! Like having sugar and cookies are the answer! Yeah, just a little of that @#it that we have all been eating for years seems to be making everyone so healthy! Don’t you think that if we didn’t really need to do this we wouldn’t?
What about those people that “cheat” as they call it?
With celiac disease I don’t see the same consequences as having that pancake breakfast when you are following weight watchers or something like it. So called, cheating is in a sense, poisoning your body and just not seeing the results for a long time. Some parents let their kids “cheat” every so often, obviously out of guilt!
Are we not here to help our children learn lessons?
Just because they are hard decisions doesn’t mean that you should feel guilty.
I urge you to not fall into that trap. It is harder to do the right thing on all accounts, but our world will soon include celiac disease and SCD the same way it has started to understand peanut allergies. Our children will be making waves and demanding choices that fit their needs.
I just finished hosting one of my best Thanksgiving dinners ever! I’m less boasting, more grateful for some of the great ideas that I have gathered from various websites plus some trial and error. http://www.againstallgrain.com/ and http://www.elanaspantry.com/ have been such a blessing for my family. When I here from others in our community and the struggles that they face with family members or friends not empathizing, I cringe at how hard this is for the parents. We have worked very hard to help our daughter to be able to understand her own body so that she will be able to tell people, with confidence, that she may not be able to eat the same way! I am grateful and blessed for every hurdle that we face, so we can learn and teach on the way to a stronger family as a whole.
We certainly all start our parental journey trepidatiously making mistakes, but hoping to learn and be better tomorrow. I’ve caught myself being critical and it sure is destructive. Be good to eachother and be good to yourself. This is valuable as a lesson to your children as much as any other subject.
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Hello world!

I am eager to share our experiences from our family thus far! I hope to help many families to shorten their own learning curve. We are, by no means, experts, but we know our family better than anyone else. That goes for any doctor or medical practitioner. We have learned that you need to search for yourself and not to take an unfavorable answer at face value.
I am looking forward to sharing this journey with you!
Peace be with you.

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